We knew it was coming just not sure how long it would take. The day when the baby bird would take flight, spread her wings and fly away…
Bout damn time. Yesssssssssss, I said it damnit!!! Lord it was the longest year of my life. Well, okay maybe not that long but still.
Back story: When our beloved little lady graduated from college last May…time flies, we or I at least only saw myself with this extra human in the house for 6 months…LIES!!! Now don’t get me wrong, we get along so much better now than we did when she turned 18. Good Lord I don’t know how I didn’t kill her. I also realize that I was far worse of a young teenager for my mother so I digress, a lot. Anywhoozle, I must again admit much like when she left for college I was anxious in getting her gone…not thinking that damn, she might be back. She came back – but it was different.
We had grown. It was good. We realized a great many things about ourselves and each other during this time apart (she didn’t tell me this but I know it!). When your children are actually smaller versions of yourself then things become real when you get to see yourself in action. I didn’t like her, well I love her but she tended to get on my nerves. I realized that I didn’t like her because she did show me myself. The attitude and mannerisms – yeah mini me in full effect.
As things go, it was discussion on a regular basis of being gone. Moving into her own space or me threatening to move. Yeah we knew the latter was not an option. It was stated though and let me be clear, she was not being forced out. We determined that it was necessary for each strong personality needed her own space and I already had mine so it was time for her to get hers, but, when she was ready. We talked regularly about the cost of being an adult. It’s not easy nor fun. So it would be at her own pace to move, but of course being who I am, she need to be gone soon.
Being diligent she looked at different places to live. Apartments mostly. Then the opportunity that works out favorable for all parties takes place. There was a condo that was for rent by owner. Two bedroom. It turned out to be perfect. Although Domynique thought she would be living alone, God had other plans. Her best friend since second grade that she had been in college with (all five years) and had lived with was in a situation with her mom that she kinda needed to be out. Boom! There is it. Both my girls together again. Perfect. I was included in the process, only by going to look at it with her. To boot, the owner, very cool I believe loved the fact that even as a young adult had her mom involved in this process. In my mind I sealed the deal. So it was.
It’s now almost two months after the move and since I started this particular blog. I am happy to report that all is well. Of course the reality of settling into adulthood and paying her own way is in full effect and she gets it now. The full effect of being a said responsible adult. Overrated she concurs. Of course I miss her presence and the moments we would share of rubbing her hands (bonding) and scratching and oiling her scalp (more bonding that I actually enjoyed). She calls me not wanting anything but to hear my voice or see my face (FaceTime) and I appreciate that because I miss her too. She would never admit that’s what it is and that’s ok, I know it in my heart.
Our children are supposed to grow up and move out to be responsible members of society. They don’t always do what we want them to or how we want them to. Thankful to the God I serve that I can say I at least got it right with her.
Now, on to the next chapter…